The time has come to surfaceNot literally, you understand. I have no intention of leaving this subterranean stronghold. An almighty cataclysm is set to befall our world, and those who trust my word would be wise to seek shelter as I have.
The date on which this disaster will occur? I would not be so foolish as to publish it here. In a bid to avoid panic buying of baked beans and blankets, I have instead buried the information in a little children's tale of mystery and suspense.
Lazlo Strangolov's Feather & Bone is set to surface in the UK on March 2nd, published by the wise souls at Walker Books. It is a cautionary story about exploding rabbits, challenged chickens and an isolated community with many dark, unspeakable secrets.
I hope it frightens and amuses in equal measure. I also trust that the eagle-eyed among you will crack the code that could prove to be the key for survival.
Having inhabited this bunker, somewhere in the foothills of the Romanian mountains, since New Year's Eve, 1999, I trust my calculations regarding the end of the world as we know it will prove correct this time.
Ten years ago, I made the mistake of relying upon popular opinion within the world of prophecy belief.
Since then, I have devoted myself to uncovering the correct date for Doomsday. I shall no longer rely upon the word of idiots, charlatans and sheep. If I am right, may I suggest you take your summer holidays early this year.
Until then, I have decided to go public with my theories, fears, hopes and beliefs, all of which you can read here. We do not have much time. Only the switched on will survive! Also the chickens.
Thank you for listening.
Your friend from the underground, Lazlo Strangolov.
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